Separated by six degrees
Sometimes I feel like Yoko… you know that crazy haired woman who broke up the Beatles? The one the world blamed for destroying the greatest thing that ever was? And even though she didn’t pull the trigger, we all know she led to his demise… The one who led to his marital breakdown leaving his son fatherless whilst his father trotted off with this nutty woman with her crazy ideas of lie ins and nakedness and potical activism in music to start a “new” family unit in a foreign country? If he wasn’t in New York Chapman would have never gotten to him… had he not fallen through the Rye…
I can’t say that I ever was attracted, in any way shape or form, to Yoko Ono. I’ve seen all the movies, read all the books, and while I get her point, I always thought she was a little out there.
Little did I know how out there I was gonna get, way back when, and while I can’t say I enjoy her music (although I do admire Sean’s, he’s turned out quite nicely). Little did I know that a friend of mine has had her on the phone… can you imagine taking a customer service call from Yoko Ono? Little did I know that this morning I would grasp her as a person…
I was listening to “Woman” this morning, and John’s opening comments:
“without each other, there ain’t nothing, and it was a different viewpoint of what I’d felt about women, and I can’t express it better than I said in the song, and it’s for Yoko, but it’s to all women”
When I heard that and it went into the opening chord (oh so recognizably sweet), and then I watched the image of Yoko sit on a park bench and light a cigarette and it hit me… She’s a person, and oh my god how much it must have hurt to lose him for her. So much so… can you even imagine? I was quite moved to tears.
And then I thought… I want to make men feel that.
That I can feel so strongly for her is not a function of my capacity as a human being so much as it is a function of my experiences coming together to converge in a moment of feeling I can relatevely contextualize and grasp within myself. It’s not that I have compassion or empathy… it’s that I have understanding.
I’m contemplating some large decisions, and will be subjecting myself to possibly the most stress I have ever endured. There is a shit storm coming, I don’t know what’s in it, I can’t even see what it looks like, I just know I have a role to play.
And I have no mommy. And I’m scared.
When my mother died, we buried a whole bunch of hatchets. That’s what you do when people die. You take the opportunity to relish what life has to offer and relenquish that which you do not need. Unfortunately even in death, some people just don’t get it.
My mother left me with a very important job… the most important of which was making sure those hatchets stay buried, and don’t infect her family’s future, it was her last gift to us.
I don’t have the luxury of being scared given the enormity of this task.
People will always try to destroy what is beautiful because they don’t see it in themselves, and that is a shame. But if my mother left me anything, it is that I am a beautiful creature, one she loved enough to leave life to. If I let people destroy that I am failing… her… and myself.
And no one can take that from me, I won’t let them.
So… understand the little child inside the man I will, and hold him close to my heart. After all… it’s written in the stars.
And thank Yoko for bringing us John.