“When personality is scarred tissue
We travel south if its used
I’m subtle like a lion’s cage
Such a cautious display
Remember, take hold of your time here
Give some meanings to the means
To your end
Not even jail”
Interpol
*****
I’m so proud of me. I completed my comments to the CRTC today, and I got them in a day ahead of time too.
I always assume my audience knows where I’m coming from, and we all know what happens when we assume, so in this case, so you don’t mistake me for having false pride, I’ll elaborate.
I’m a very small businesswoman (on all fronts). I’ve spent the majority of my career aspiring to soaring type heights… my original plan being a boardroom, and my backup plan being a stage.
I’m realizing more and more the implications of both. I’m not the beneficiary of any institutional education… I earned my knocks the hard way, in life.
I’ve felt for more than a few years now that I had a short time to establish myself on a path that would secure my future. Up until my 30’s everything had been play. It all got rather serious around then, I mean, securing the future is a pretty serious task.
The implications of both.
I’ve been in a boardroom or two in my day, and while I used to think it was pretty glamourous, it’s really quite tedious. Reporting to a boards of directors is like having your brain squeezed by 12 individuals at once. Then they return you to the pack to impound their wishes upon their populace.
I’ve not been on a stage a terrible amount of times, but I know it’s scary. I get the sensation it’s like an audience full of people pulling on you in a all their directions while you try and stay focused….. while they’re focused on YOU.
I’ve been playing on a stage of my own creation for three years, and I have learned to love and hate it. There’s nothing glamourous unless I make it so, there’s nothing scary unless I make it so.
I never imagined I’d go to Parliament Hill though… I was there as a youngster, and I’ve always thought those people were so lucky to work in a place that is resplendant with the aspirations of our forefathers….. foremothers… foresons and foredaughters.
How inspiring it must be.
And how inspired am I that I have the courage to contribute to something bigger than myself. I have always thought of myself as intelligent, but for a lack of experience, formal training, and institutional education… I have never thought of myself as capable.
I am proud that I know that I am capable.